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Momma Kiss: I'd like to thank the Academy

Momma Kiss

If momma ain't happy, ain't nobody happy!

Sunday, March 7, 2010

I'd like to thank the Academy

Tonight the Oscars are on.  I have an acceptance speech of my own to make.


See that? That award? If any of you boys or girls were considering taking a shot at MommaKiss, well, you may have a little competition. It seems that thinks I'm a Dream Girl Blogger.

Yah - you read that right. I'm surprised, too. The best part? He didn't give me any rules - like most 'awards' - which, you know, totally works for me. No, Dan, no ceremonies or animal sacrifices needed.

I do, however, think it's reasonable to share why I may (or may not) be a Dream Girl.

Here's some potential reasons for the accolade:

First the obvious;  I'm hot.  Or cute. Whatever.

I have been naked with 3 other women. Apparently Dan liked that concept.

I'm a sports fan. Like I actually like watching sports. Currently, college basketball is the craze in The Kiss Hizza.  Also - refer to this declaration that I'm a catch.*

I got my husband a humidor for Christmas. And a kick ass cigar.  Maybe men associate smoking cigars to blow jobs or something, but Dan found this admirable. The humidor purchasing part. I think.

I've been told that my voice is quite nice. You know how weird that is? Like how different your voice sounds in your head than it does to other people? However, and I quote, my voice has made someone "melt."  Hmm, maybe I should look into a different career.

I think eyes tell a lot about someone. And mine? I actually like my eyes. One of the few features I never bitch about. Not to mention, laugh lines are ALL the rage, right?

I'm a fan of afternoon delights and I'm just plain beautiful and badass.

Well, I'm sure I could go on and On and ON, but I'm afraid I must leave some of my dreamy qualities to the imagination. Of course if anyone would like to expand on this list, feel free. You know. I'm not at all against you going on and on about me.

Thanks Dan. Keep waiting for those pictures, maybe someday I'll send them.

*Snort. That was fun to re-read.



Blogger Moooooog35 said...

Your voice makes people melt?

Is it possible that your breath is just really really horrible?

Just sayin. Melting people when you speak may not be a good thing.

3/7/10, 9:37 AM  
Blogger MommaKiss said...

FYI, Moog with 6 o's, I'm insanely obsessive about brushing my teeth.

I'll blame your narcotic episodes for your comment.

Carry on.

3/7/10, 10:13 AM  
Blogger JenJen said...

Hi dammit.
I'm so jealous I can't stand it.

3/7/10, 10:18 AM  
Blogger Dan @ Jane, You Ignorant Slut said...

As I told Momma, nekkid with other chicks is an enormous trump card.

(And the corroborating pics as proof was a VERY nice touch, btw.)

3/7/10, 10:55 AM  
Blogger Aunt Becky said...

Heh. You're HOT. Heh.

3/7/10, 12:37 PM  
Blogger Kim said...

mmm, and skinny and quiet?

3/7/10, 9:30 PM  
Blogger Val said...

nekid pics huh?

And I can vouch - it's not her breath that makes people melt. ;)

3/8/10, 1:02 PM  
Blogger MommaKiss said...

Yes skinny AND quiet, too!
And vally gril, you know you want me every time we speak. feeling's mutual, babe :)

3/8/10, 1:44 PM  
Blogger Jenny said...

Funny girl. I saw you on PJ's blog and dropped in to say hi!

3/9/10, 9:47 AM  

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Say hi, dammit! For the love o Gah, I hope you have an e-mail that I can reply to. Plleeeease say you do!

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