What IS THIS thing??

Can you hear that fucking thing?

I don't know if it's a bird or a grasshopper on steroids or what the hell, but it's SOFUCKING LOUD.

Problem is, the bitch only comes out at night, when I can't see shit, even with a flashlight (I've tried).

So I can't even use The Google to try to figure it out.

I mean, how do you google "what kind of animal makes a sound like screetch screetch blarghing screetch."

Why do I want to find out what it is?

So I can find out how to kill the motherfucker.


****
fyi
I was stalked today. What a lovely surprise. I've always wanted a stalker. That GiGi is a trick, I tell ya. A sneaky stealthy ninja TRICK!